Friday, July 22, 2005

Beat it up, skeet it up, raw dog????

"And you went raw dog when you beat it, that's when she is going to tell you to beat it."-Kayne West

"Emotions"~Destiny Child ( I have a new found respect for them after the BET Awards)

After reading a blog of a respectable blogger, I had to make this post. I have been thinking about posting about HIV/AIDS for sometime. I'm always shocked at how people respond to this issue. They get scared and absolutely refuse to get tested. I'm baffled at the thought of not getting tested because of your sexual history. Is that not more of a reason to get tested? The thought of "I rather not know" is all to real for me.

I have a friend (lets call him Scary) he has had two scares with the deadly disease HIV/AIDS. Even though he is older than me, I treat him as my little brother. I was the first person he told of his bisexuality who wasn't bisexual. I was always there to give advice, lean on, whatever was necessary. I even saved his life (literally), so needless to say, we were close. Well, outside of our arguments about his antics and risky choices/behavior (Okay, back to the story). The first scare was the summer before his departure for college. He wanted to get tested because he had unprotected sex several times with a couple of people (3-4). I initiated the conversation of him getting tested. I was seriously concerned about his well-being and I was over the shock of his sexuality (I was a holyroller at the time-don't stone me. He also broke the stereotype, which I secretly appreciate. I knew that stereotype was a lie anyway, but I was still shocked b/c it was him). And he uttered the words "I'm scared". "WHAT?!" "Why are you scared?!" You were bad enough to have unprotected sex, but you aren't bad enough to take a test? I had to pull off b/c I realize I was being a little insensitive to his harsh reality, but I still didn't understand his mentality. The thing that really freaked me out was "condoms were there in my reach and I didn't use them" (I could have reached over and hit him with a dumb stick). After many conversations and a lot of persuasion he got tested. Results, negative per his words. He was happy and relieved.

~Dwele "Kick out of you"

A couple of years (2-3) later it came up again. And he shares with me some of his risky behaviors. At this point, I'm like WHAT IN THE HECK have you been doing? You went off to college and lost your mind. I too was in college at this time, but the things he was involved in were rumors to me. I was very upset with him. However, I tried to hide it as much as possible and I turned into the comforter. I went back to my stance on you have to get tested. His response "my friend got tested and the results were negative." Again, I could have jumped through the phone and knock the "bajesus" out of him. "He can't be serious".... I let him know that meant nothing. Get your own! Do you know this fool said "I don't think I would want to know." WHAT?! Again, after a lot persuasion he gets it. This time he was a little more resisted and I told him next time you come home we take the test together. Well, that didn't work "your not sexually active" it doesn't matter to you. "Good point-maybe you need to follow my lead on this one." Back to story, the results- negative per his words. He exhales...he slips again. Now he is with someone who I find to be very strange. I'm like this person is very sickly to be so young. Sidenote: I think he (Scary) has a kid. A mutual friend who he confines his really outrageous stuff to mentioned a child, but he has never admitted this to me(back to story). So of course, me being me- I ask what's up with this person? "If the person has it, he know he has it b/c of unprotected sex." I really could have blowin' his brains out. Are we really discussing unprotected sex again? We talked about this the last two times. I have been trying to get him tested for a little over a year now and he has yet to do it. " I don't have enough time"(*bam heads on the wall). Sidenote: he still finds time to have sex. People will bring the test to you and they will not use a needle. Still no time! WHAT?! You have lies! He promises to get it done in Aug.

Please ppl there is no excuse for anyone not to know their current status. Ppl will come to your house, they willn't use a needle, they willn't take your name or any personal information. There is NO EXCUSE!!!!! I have a few friends who work in health departments and they have stories of 14 year olds coming in and finding out they are HIV+ and they don't know what it is. Is that not sad?! And some ppl refuse to get further information about the disease they have. WHAT?! Before you engage in ANY sexual act you need to see some paper and I'm not talking about cash. I'm talking about a paper that list ALL SEXUAL TRANSMITTED DISEASES and a negative report from your partner. That is your responsibility. I'm not advocating sex, but I am saying if you are going to have sex know whom you are dealing with. I really think sex is overrated ....Funny how I can say that, huh?

Extras
  • Condoms don't prevent disease such as herpes (u would be surprise at many sexual active adults don't know that). Condoms are for bodily fluids ppl, that's IT!
  • The only way to be 100% of your sexual health is no sexual intercourse (no oral either) don't laugh I'm serious. There are safe ways to go about oral sex (dental dams) too (again not 100%)
  • HIV/AIDS test that come back negative doesn't mean the person is not infected. Sometimes it takes time to show up.
  • Plain in simple wrap it up. No glove, no love. No matter how big it is or how wet it maybe.
  • For more info. http://www.aidsinfo.nih.gov/ (I'm not going to list stats, I'm sure you all have seen them.
  • Also, take an active roll in getting people informed about this disease and other sexual diseases. I made it my personal business to make people aware of this and other sexual transmitted diseases through organizations I'm involved. Matter of fact, the undergrads had a forum tonight (well, last night technically)
  • I added a counter on Tuesday...that's impressive for me HTML is not my thing at all.

In closing....

"Aint no lovin' good enough for me to get burned while I'm up in it"- Snoooppp Dog

*As always give me some feedback and no proofing*- I need to do better, but I want. Blogging is enough work on it's own.

12 Comments:

At 6:28 AM, Blogger mytruth said...

OMG....THIS IS CRAZY LONG! I may not blog as often as I should, but I definitely blog when I do...lol

 
At 2:17 PM, Blogger Mahogany Elle said...

Thanks for your comment on my blog. Overly analytic me would like to like, what do you mean by "the madness"? Bad post? ...
Explain pls :)

 
At 2:17 PM, Blogger Mahogany Elle said...

oops, meant would like [to know]

 
At 2:31 PM, Blogger Zantiferous3 said...

An important post. Unbelievable the things ADULTS don't know about sex and sexually transmitted diseases. Grown ass men, still walking around talking about, "She was clean... she didn't look like she has anything." *shaking head* My response, "Neither does Magic Johnson." *sigh*

Thanks for visiting my site. =)

 
At 2:49 PM, Blogger nai' said...

Hmmmmmmmm, Perhaps your friend has been tested. I do believe that there are a lot of people who won't get tested because they are scared. I also think that there are a lot of people who have been tested and found positive, but would rather not let anyone know by stating that they are scared. Either way, that is selfish behavior. I can't feel sorry for a person who knowingly goes into a situation with the ramifications looming above their heads, but when they bring an innocent person into the picture, it burns. And yes, the other person should probably have been more careful, but sometimes, we wrongfully give people the benefit of the doubt.

Cee
http://nai.typepad.com

 
At 3:27 PM, Blogger sensational_star said...

That's a serious post. I'm constantly trying to remind a girlfriend that, "yeah, his car might be kinda fly and yes, girl, I do agree that was a nice place he took you out to but that still doesn't make him invincible of contracting AIDS." There's too many people dying because of this disease, and there are still people who rather take their chances. It really amazes me.

 
At 7:37 PM, Blogger Suezette b.k.a. Mz.Black Geisha said...

wow...so since everyone took basically what I wanted to say...just know that I am here reading your blog and I haven't abandoned you baby boy...your entry as all you other entries have been was awesome

 
At 2:24 AM, Blogger sweetlime said...

great blog!!! i love this entry because its so real. stay safe!!!

 
At 9:09 AM, Blogger *Madosi said...

Great post man!

Not enough people think about the seriousness of the disease or their actions. I must admit I have not always thought about the seriousness and I lost my brother to complications from AIDS more than 10 years ago.

I must say I was impressed this weekend to see BET doing a special on the importance of getting tested and knowing your status. This from a station that promotes sex, for the most part ... it was still a relief that they decided to touch on the issue! Not enough are!

 
At 9:11 AM, Blogger MEP said...

Yeah, I can't believe that grown ups seem to be even worse about protection than teenagers do these days. There is no excuse for unprotected sex when you aren't in an EXCLUSIVE (monogamous) relationship. Preach it!

 
At 9:47 AM, Blogger Domite said...

You know the first time I took an HIV test my rational was exactly what you said. If I'm bad enough to Raw Dogg then I'm bad enough to wait 14 days. After that the tests are nothing. They become just something a sexually active person should have done like a pap for a female.

Lastly, never worry about the length of a GOOD informative blog my brotha Blog ON!

 
At 11:04 PM, Blogger spchrist said...

Ever considered a career as a motivational speaker?

 

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